Monday, May 12, 2014

Wanderer's Journal #34

        Marie-Lynn and I resisted the unrest of the reality we knew for as long as we could. In her world, we worked away the days. On the plateau that our home rested upon, we built a firepit and an accompanying wood shed. Some nights, I would tend to a little fire. The smoke always went towards the Great Expanse. It drifted towards the mysterious unknown, taking with it my desire for the uncontrollable. Occasionally I wondered what would happen if I jumped into the flames. Would I become smoke and fly away? Or would I be unmoved, rooted to that unreality?
        As for Marie-Lynn, she often spent her nights in unnecessary rest. In the waking hours of her days, she did drawings on the cliff. She say precariously on the edge, occasionally dropping her pencil to the rocks below. But no fear of falling could have come over Marie-Lynn in her own world. Still, I wondered why she chose that location. She never told me. Her drawings were basic like a child's at first, and for some time this infuriated her. My flames devoured many early sketches. On rainy days, the fire was left to die, and a cavern would open up in the cliff for Marie-Lynn to take refuge in. I spent those days discovering my bad handiwork on the roof, while Marie-Lynn disappeared to practice.
        It took a thunderstorm for me to go see her. That decade in her world had been quiet. The two of us contented ourselves with individual work. Sometimes from my pit I would look over at her and want to join, but I held myself back. The thunderstorm, however, threatened to drown the towering plateau. Storms in unreality are strange like that. Drenched, I sprinted to the cavern, although I did not know the path. I guessed as best I could, and came across a slippery ledge along the cliff wall. I started on it without fear. Surely enough, I found Marie-Lynn looking across the Great Expanse. The cavern was deep and lit by Marie-Lynn's demand. The rock walls were covered in papers. Each paper seemed to be a different variation of the same drawing, but before I could get too close, Marie-Lynn stepped into my path. Her flaming hair brushed the ground when she walked.
        “I thought that might get you down here.” She caressed my face and then wiped the water on her pants. “You're soaked. I'm afraid I can't let you in until you dry off.” She grinned playfully.
        “Well I'm going to need a towel then. You'll do.” I snatched her and embraced her with all my being. At first she squirmed as if it was a game of catch, but after a bit she wrapped her arms around me and squeezed the air out of me.
        “Okay! Fine! You can come in! But wipe your feet!” She cried out as she pulled away from me. She twirled away, disappearing into the cavern. I did as she asked and chased after her.
        The sketches grew visible and almost understandable as I got closer. On every paper, there was an ever-progressing tree in some mysterious woods. From one to another, nothing seemed to changed, but fifty drawings later it seemed to be another tree entirely. I followed them and watched the tree grow old and incredibly large. At the end, at the final drawing, only the base of the tree could be seen, with a little sapling beside it.
        “These have incredible detail! You've been working hard. It has paid off, but why a tree?”
        “Don't you think we're getting a bit old? Maybe one day we'll be this tree, living in happy peace.” I had known that she was trying to suggest something beyond old retirement, but I pushed it out of my mind.
        “Not with the way things are going in reality right now. That tree is bound to get chopped down long before its time.”
        “Not if you talked to your grandfather! You could stop this, Jesse! You could make it so that the sapling can grow under the careful watch of that old tree! He respects your opinion! You could save our home and our lives!” This was the beginning of her pestering me. This was the beginning of the end. The worst is that she was right.
        “Marie-Lynn, we don't know anything about politics. Our input would be uneducated and could bring more harm than not. As much as I hate our position in reality, it's best if we just stay out of it. Let's stay in unreality and ignore the occasional day in reality.” I pleaded, but she hated my words.
        “You're an infuriating coward, Jesse! Here you are, completely capable of saving your home, your family, your love, and yourself, and yet you refuse to do it! Isn't it worth the risk?” The correct answer was 'yes'.
        “I don't want to make things worse! I couldn't bear to lose you to the spectre of death! I love you too much to say goodbye!” My words were filled with passion, but Marie-Lynn knew the truth better.
        “I will die if you don't do this! As part of his family, you're an enemy unless you act against him! He can't win this fight, and when he loses, both of us are dead! Don't you understand this?” I didn't reply. Instead I joined the storm and tried to hide myself from the truth.
        But, as I've shown, I could only avoid the truth for so long.

-Zero
  

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