I think it's about time I explained what things were like back in those times, in reality. Reality was often cruel and unforgiving for our generation. I remember watching others and observing their corrupt ways. Corruption ran deep with my generation. Many children, some still in elementary school had already found their way to drugs somehow. It was a sad thing to hear about, for it made me worry about our future. The draw of sex reared it's ugly head at the females not long after they hit twelve. Boys, not men who were older than me went after these girls hoping to trick them into sex. Many times the females did what the boys asked of them, as disgusting as that is. Not only would these older boys take away their innocence, they would soon introduce them to the world of drugs. Drugs like marijuana were generally harmless to adults; they could heal. Children were different, their brains were still at a peak point of development and the drugs would damage the development. This could cause sever depression and addictions to these drugs, even the non-addictive ones. The endorphins in your brain would die off thanks to marijuana, one day they would return but it would take time. This time of recovery was often too long for most drug users; they began to need the drug to be happy. I will admit that this is perhaps the most pathetic thing I have ever seen. What a concept! To be a slave of something that does not live. It controls your mind because you let it and only you suffer. Many children our age succumbed to such problems, lost forever in a sea of tears. Perhaps one day they would stop but now they have no choice.
I'll tell you what started all of this. Civil war. The war in drugs was perhaps the worst idea I had ever seen, I saw an uprising coming. With so many children supporting the legalization of drugs and the power the drug dealers held over the users, it was obvious what would happen. One day the government made a huge error, they sent in the army reserves to physically fight the war. The war on drugs had been a more political thing in my country but now the guns are being shot. The drug dealers saw something like this coming and prepared, preparing the users. See many of the users were relatively close to someone completely clean who didn't know. So when war broke out, the reserves found them fighting each other. There was no victor in those battles, no side went home. Then the government panicked and withdrew our troops that were off fighting in some foreign country because they did not know better. This is where I came in.
See I was a nobody, I was invisible to everyone else. Marie-Lynn only seemed to notice me most of the time. I passed through peoples lives like a specter, almost like death itself. I never stood out to my fellow students, well except for when they would see my marks. They wouldn't remember me anyways. My grandfather on the other hand was an incredibly powerful man. He was the man who lead this country. He was the sole person who could call off the war on drugs and bring peace to our home once more. He knew that people would riot if that happened, most of them afraid because of all the propaganda surrounding drugs. But I'll ask you this, what is worse, a war between your people or little riots from time to time? I think the answer is obvious here, but he was afraid to do so. I knew all I had to do was say it and it would get done, for he trusted my judgement despite my age. Maybe he trusted me because I was one of them, I saw everything from behind enemy lines. I knew how to please the mass that I watched ever so closely. Marie-Lynn, my best friend and so much more tried to bring me to say it to him. I knew that his choice would get him killed in the process and I did not want that. He was a righteous and honorable man, he was honest and trustworthy. He was a very odd politician, but his determination brought him to this point, to this choice.
She begged me to ask him, to murder him. I knew that I was not a hero, no matter how many times she would call me that. My head became blurred and my world became confused, emotions and logic do not mix well together. One day, right before he released the troops onto themselves I had a chance to speak with him. I said nothing and wished him luck. I walked out, empty now but filled with dark thoughts of things to come. Marie-Lynn begged me to go back, and I was about to. That was, until I lost it. Control has never been a strong point of mine, sometimes I snap back and it's never nice. I took my sword, a blade that was honorable like my grandfather; a blade given to me by him. I took it and pierced her in her large, caring, beating heart. I murdered her instead of spilling the blood of an honorable man. She was no worse than he was though and he died two days after, suicide. I was the murder of both and soon after he died, I ran away. This world was not safe anymore, and it's all my fault. There's a beginning to every end, why didn't I see it.
-Zero
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