Dreaming of more (poem)

Sometimes I feel this life will never fit,

or rather that I will never fit in it.

No matter how I change the characters,

it never gets to how I imagined.

I'm taunted by thoughts of what could be:

there's always room for improvement, right?

Dreaming of the future can go two ways:

dreaming of a life that can come to pass,

and dreaming of a fantasy world that can never be.

The dreamer has to learn the difference,

and I wonder if I can tell them apart,

choose a path forward that leads somewhere.

I think I feel this life will never fit

because I'm suffering from lingering fantasies:

ever after filled with breath-taking beauty

instead of the mediocrity of reality,

a life I would come to destroy.

I'm so sick of living in fantasy.

-Zero